Saturday, June 19, 2004

Search me, know me, try me and see
Every worthless affection hidden in me
All I'm asking for is that You'd cleanse me Lord

Create in me a heart that's clean
Conquer the power of secret shame
Come wash away the guilty stain of all my sin
Clothe me in robes of righteousness
Cover my nakedness with grace
All of my life before You now I humbly bring

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

feeling moody. i need to get out.


gonna go run.

Sunday, June 06, 2004

why is time passing sooooo slowly......

can we speed it up just a little bit... please??




been having interesting dreams lately. one of which was a war dream... it sends chills down my spine if i replay it in my head even now. koreahn, you're gonna love this.

it starts out with a battle scene. it was me, my sister, eric, and a few others... the sun was shining brightly and the dust flying everywhere. ping-pong-ball-like objects flew at us from every possible direction, and we were all running around trying to find some kind of shield from them.... hiding behind big rocks, trees. it was weird cuz our enemies were nowhere to be seen... all we could see were these balls flying at us and exploding within seconds after hitting the ground. i think i even saw someone fall to the ground... but there was no time to look out for others cuz one second lost could cost me my life. when i quickly found that i couldn't stay alive much longer by just running to avoid the objects, i looked for a more permanent place away from them... and this is when i saw a hole on the ground... just big enough for me. when i went under, i found that it wasn't just a hole... it led to a big open space underground that had obviously been used as a hiding place in the past. on the sides were door-less rooms... with a lot of wood, hammer and nails. so i used them to make a door and secure myself in one of the rooms.

i had been sitting there trembling with fear for what seemed like forever.. until i heard someone walk towards the room i was in. i thought it was over when i heard the banging on the door in attempt to tear it down. but to my indescribable RELIEF, it was eric. he had come looking for me. so together, we went closer to the hole we came through for any noise above. when we heard nothing, we decided it would be safe to climb back up and look for others... i was scared to death for my sister.

so eric climbed out first and when i lifted my arms through the hole to get out.......... i heard the chilling voice of our enemy say, "stop right there." and i could see the end of a gun pointing at my hands. my heart sank and my body froze. after a few seconds, i was told to come out. when i did, the stranger in army attire stood there... he handed me a gun and told me to shoot eric... and that if i don't, i'd die. i got on my knees and begged for mercy.... with no success. the man stood looking away as if he heard and saw nothing of what i said and did. so i sat there, with the gun in my hand.... battling inside.......


.......thank God for the lawn mowers outside my window... the loud noise woke me up before i had to make a decision. *whew*


ok it's bedtime... time to think happy thoughts......... =)