happy birthday to my sister!

:)

before i start what i expect to be a pretty long entry, let me point you to my pictures link on the left side of the page. i've updated since boston with pictures from the retreat and the hopkins ksa banquet. and i will be posting more soon with pictures from birthdays and my graduation. enjoy! (and please refrain from making comments about how i take a lot of pictures of myself or with guys... or just how i take boring pictures. ahem)

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tomorrow is my last day of college. it's scary how quickly time passes by. it seems only yesterday when i was sitting in the cafeteria on the first day of my freshman year and wrote in a journal in anticipation of the start of a new stage in life.

now as this stage comes to an end, i reflect upon the many events, not to mention life-lessons that came along with them, which have prepared me to take the next step into another new stage.

when i think of freshman year, i just wonder how i ever got through it. i can flash through my mind painful glimpses of times when i cried out to God in utter despair and helplessness... and many times, even anger. i remember clenching my fists tightly and wanting so much to make it through so that i could prove to the world that i didn't need anybody's help or pity.

i will never forget the time that my sister and i had lunch together in the exchange cafe during my hour break between classes. we shared more than just pizza that day. if i look back on it now, it was as if our life-long buildup of heartaches was being quietly expressed in the sharing of a few silent tears. i will always remember it.

sophomore year was eye-opening (to say the least) and taught me a lot of new things. my sister and i had moved out over the summer and were on our own, and i even got a car of my own. this is when i officially started my experience in accounting as an intern at a firm in lutherville.

i still remember the horror when i found out that i would be tainting my perfect academic record with a B. i just laugh now when i think about how i lost sleep that night and even cried over it. if only i had known how many more of those i would get in the future, i would've brushed it off like it was nothing.

another monumental event occurred during my sophomore year that i will sum up with the word, reconciliation.

junior year... again, i was brought down to my knees. the experience of watching those who are dearest to my heart struggle in ways i never expected humbled and tested me to the core. in the process, i was led to confront and learn trust. academically, i'd say this year was the most demanding.

the summer after my junior year, i was given the opportunity to get a taste of what it's like to work in a big 5 (now big 4) accounting firm. some of you faithful readers of my blog know how proud i was to have driven to 3 different states! and it was actually the first time i ever traveled on an airplane alone. :) hehehe...

senior year... it just went downhill from there. hahahaha.. i'll just say i've mastered procrastination. in knowing that a job is waiting for me upon graduation, my declaration that i do everything for the glory of God alone was challenged again and again.

through it all, i can only be amazed that my unfaithfulness, anger at the world, self-reliance, and laziness didn't stop God from blessing me. i was given everything i needed at the exact time and in the exact amount that i needed them. it was not as easy to say at the time, but looking back, i can honestly say that i may not have been able to be where i am now if everything didn't happen the way it did when it did and if i didn't meet all the people i met when i met them.

and now i am here. with many new beginnings ahead. all i can say is that i am so excited that i don't know how to contain it. i just pray that God's faithfulness be ever manifest not only through the testimony of my past but also in me now and in the future.

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happy birthday. sorry for getting mad tonight. :) you knew i can't stay mad at you for long, right? let's make today memorable for you..